Judge the Spirits

I recently gave an old school mate from college the opportunity to stay in my house as the third member of my household, the second being another school mate from college who had at the time stayed with me for close to a month.

That night he moved in with his things we sat down and discussed how we would go about food, electricity and water bills, how we would share them as 50/50 as they can be shared between three people. Then we discussed how we would go about the chores around the home, how we would hire someone to do the errands, how each one would be responsible for his own cooking and how each one would have to clean up after themselves.

I come Prepared

 May I not see her when I cross her path, may I not hear her when she calls from across the street. May she be far from me always, may I not comprehend the things she says to me, may I not understand her gestures and her meanings. The woman with ill intention.

I like to look a man in the face when he speaks to me, you can tell what they mean and don’t mean, when they hide and where they pretend. And for women it is but the same. She speaks with an intention to deceive me. Her eyes smile as she looks me directly in the eye with her mouth curled into a mischievous smile. She croons softly, seductively. She says one thing but means another.  She suggests things and actions with the speech of her words and body. She raises her voice in the street, that its timbre will cause you to turn.

The Institute of Satanic Propaganda

I have often wondered what the Devil’s offices in charge of ‘Human Affairs’ look like, most especially the Propaganda Department under that institution. I have imagined the Propaganda Department as having one division in charge of creating Anti-Jesus rhetoric, another division in charge of packaging said material in various user-friendly formats and another division in charge of distributing the material to people across the globe at scheduled times.

She got pregnant...

Most girlfriends don’t know and others refuse to acknowledge that when they tell their man that they are pregnant his first reactionary thought will be to ditch them and run. ”He would never do that,” that’s what they say and what some of them think.

Sure enough, on a good day 50% of men will be faithful enough to say they will support the baby, that’s 10% of their brain talking. The rest of their brain is thinking: “damn, crap, bollocks, how do I get out of this?

When you Pray

It is very annoying when I tell you my problems and you answer me by saying ‘don’t worry God knows best’, ‘God has a plan ’,’ wait for God’s time’. I have heard it so much that it no longer gives me comfort to hear it but only manages to irritate me. You only come off as stupid saying it, for those words rub salt to the wound and do not comfort.

Then there are those who say I should be more aggressive in the way I pray. They say I should not say ‘thy will be done’ but I should come and ‘claim’ the answers I seek to my prayers. That too seems very daft to me now.

The Angel that Weeps for the Sons of Men

She says that she hates me and never will speak to me again. She says that for the tears she cried all night over me I will certainly pay. She says may God forgive me and what goes around comes around. She says if she dies her spirit will haunt me forever.

I look down at my feet in shame and sadness. I know I should never have broken the heart of someone who loved me so greatly. And yet I let her go out of her own best interest for rather than let her keep receiving an incomplete love I wanted her to receive a love that was complete and not that which felt like it was being squeezed from a stone.

The Ganja Planter Chronicles

There is a legend in Zomba of a house on top of a mountain. To get to that house from down where the local version of a main road is you get to walk for two hours uphill climbing. The owner of the house is isolated, if you try you won’t succeed to make him move down the mountain to where the other villagers’ houses are. It is a strategic position for him and his trade. He is a Ganja Planter. Any cop who would be willing to climb that hill for two hours is surely worth his salt and so few even try. The few who get there are palm-oiled effectively.

The Anti-Satan Drug

Christianity is like the Anti-Retroviral (ARV) Drug. Whether you take it or not is your choice. If it does not kill you then it will definitely lead you to a better state of health. If you do not take it you will die and if you take it you will experience a better state of health than if you hadn’t, and then you will die.

And yes the drug must be taken for the rest of your life. If you at any moment cease to take your medication then you will be far worse off than if you had not taken the drug in the first place. It must be taken appropriately, too much can kill you and too little will not help you.

Fashion, Pretty girls and Old friends in the Church

I admit I go to church for a number of really stupid reasons. Firstly, I go to church to catch up on the latest fashions, what’s hot-what’s not-what works with what. It’s so entertaining seeing all those men and women all dressed up in eye-catching outfits, walking down the aisle in single file to give their offering. Clothes, shoes, amazing hairdo’s, accessories, class and good taste, it’s all there. Hell I’m never going to be invited to the FAME Malawi Fashion Week and you definitely have to pay to see people dressed up at a fashion show so yeah I might as well just see it for free at the church. They are all poised, trying to make a dignified and graceful walk past me, aware of how fine they look. It’s such a beautiful sight, so captivating, except of course those few who make very bad fashion choices and look horrible.

How to marry an Angel and a Demon

Sometimes I feel like I have found me a wife, the right person to marry. And sometimes I feel like I could do better. How do you know who is the right person to marry? How does one find the perfect partner when all human beings are by design flawed?

And they say go with your gut or instincts and others say trust your heart to know the right person but currently my gut and heart are very useless for they are just as confused as I am. Sure there are a lot of things I like about her but then there are a lot of other things I do not like as well. How do you strike a balance? How can you be sure you will live the rest of your life with peace of mind over any decision you make now, for or against?

A Life well Lived

The Corporate /working world is overrated. Think about it, if you get to work for 20 years and get to build a mansion and have all the wealth you wanted who does your life benefit but yourself, your family and friends, and sometimes maybe the odd stranger? So, if you are working for a company this is all you could ever be, ever achieve.

When you work for God however the value of your life exceeds merely providing for your needs, the needs of your family and friends, and bits of charity here and there. When you work for God you reach out to strangers, some people you don’t know and some you will never meet. So you achieve much much more than you would if you worked a 7am to 5pm job for the same number of years, say 20.

Fight for Us!

When you find your wife or husband in bed with another man or woman there’s only two ways you can react. You can either loose it and beat the Bloody Mary’s out of the guy trying to fit into your shoes or you can be overwhelmed with shock and just decide to leave. The next step after this though must be thought out very carefully before you take it.

Suppose you decide to pack your things and leave the marriage. Biblically you are within your rights to leave  as the bible allows you to divorce a cheating spouse(Matthew 19:9), my interpretation. But before you leave ask yourself, if you are so ready to leave the life you had with your partner, all the things you have been through together just like that then was that relationship worth anything to you at all?

Once upon a Beautiful Man

Every once in a while I admit to myself that there are beautiful men in this world. Not good-looking or handsome but beautiful. Just as there are women who walk in a room and turn male and female heads there are men in this world gifted with goods that make man and woman alike stare. You look at them and they are just so perfect, so smart, so appetizing to the taste-buds of the eyes. You think to yourself, if he is a man then who am I? Is it an angel I see or am I dreaming dreams?

As much as I appreciate the beautiful men in my society and my world I have never been driven to desire them as I would a woman. Of all my sinful thoughts and sinful lusts never have I desired to have sexual relations with a fellow man. The thought just never occurred to me. 

Silence not a Virtue

I have been silent for about 8 months. In the time I have been away from you I have stolen a carpet, stolen an extension cable, participated in corrupting the Road Traffic Department, taken money that wasn’t mine. I have wished evil on several people, been filled with anger and fury over trivial matters, been impatient with men when I should have known better, and have imagined several women naked. Yes I have been very busy and very naughty.

All this I did while I was still a Christian, all these while I was still a servant of God. Yes I still believe in God the Father, Jesus the Son and the Holy Spirit but not the Holy Catholic Church (I donno what the HCC is even though it is in the Apostle’s Creed). So the question now arises: If I as a believing, practicing, spirit-filled Christian did all these things and fell into such folly how different am I from the average guy on the street who doesn’t care about God? To ask it differently, how am I different from you, him or her there?