She got pregnant...

Most girlfriends don’t know and others refuse to acknowledge that when they tell their man that they are pregnant his first reactionary thought will be to ditch them and run. ”He would never do that,” that’s what they say and what some of them think.

Sure enough, on a good day 50% of men will be faithful enough to say they will support the baby, that’s 10% of their brain talking. The rest of their brain is thinking: “damn, crap, bollocks, how do I get out of this?

Could it be she is mistaken? What will my family think of me? What will my family say? What will my friends say? What do I do? How do I support a family? Does this mean I have to quit school and get a job? Does this mean I have to stop partying and having fun and use the little resources I have for the baby and mother?

So at this point the guy sees two options. On one hand there is pressure, pressure, pressure if he accepts the pregnancy. And on the other hand he can continue life as normal, pursue his dreams, enjoy life as he wanted and follow the plans and course he set for his life to the fullest measure if he denies the pregnancy. That’s one tough spot to be at and I never want to be put in that spot ever again. True an honourable man will accept the pregnancy but show me an honourable man who never, not even once, thought of escaping in this situation and I will show you a liar!

True, in modern days women can support babies on their own and go back to school or work. True, men can still support their babies and go on as if life was normal, as if there never was a bump in the road. But lets face it, the majority of the people this happens to don’t have that privilege. For them a pregnancy means permanent derailment of dreams, hopes, school, career. They are forced to give up the life they wanted for one they weren’t even sure they would want, at least till now.

 

Given this fact, many men find it impossible to give up all these plans and find it easier to just run and hide. Given the choice between a blissful life and a hard life I would choose the peaceful one, wouldn’t you? So all girlfriends out there having wild, imaginative and creative sex ask yourselves, ”if you get pregnant why should he keep you in his life?”

Of the men I have seen accepting pregnancies I have noted several things. Overall of these though is that a man will accept the pregnancy if you possess some amount of value to him. Others marry a girl they got pregnant only because she is beautiful and wont shame them. Others marry her just out of fear that their reputation will be ruined if they don’t. Others marry such a girl because they trust her to make a good wife and respect the relationship they had with her. Others marry her because they have no choice, they will suffer in their souls for the rest of their lives if they refuse to accept their child. All these pose a certain amount of value to a man. So dear girlfriend ask yourself, ”how valuable are you to the man and what sort of value at that?” What in you will make him honour the pregnancy as his own, stick around, go through all the embarrassments with his and your friends and family, and the struggle of providing for an unplanned for child?

Remember, at this moment he is not thinking “I love her”, he is not thinking “we look good together”. He is not thinking of what a cute couple you are and the cute family you will make together. His heart is pumping furiously in all directions, regrets and “if only’s” are misfiring in his brain, he is being forced into a corner he thought would never come and is unready for. One of the greatest frights you can give a man is to tell him you have missed your monthly period. Fear has gripped him, his body breaks into a  cold sweat right after he feels his heart has been pulled out of his body. 

He is not excited about the coming baby. He is looking for the quickest and most effective way out, the

fastest exit, be it a window or a crack in the wall or a hole in the ground. Girlfriends, are you sure you will take your chances with someone who is going through this sort of breakdown? Will you say “let come to me what will come to me” and have sex with a guy who in time of crisis will think from morning to nightfall, week in week out, month to month, of how effectively he can get rid of you and what excuse he can use to run away from you in such a time of crisis?

Love is a game of deception, only the simple believe the words and promises said to each other in moments of passion actually mean anything or amount to something tangible. Any fool will tell you when he is sexually excited or drunkenly intoxicated with love that he will never leave you nor forsake you. The wise know in this case it is best to believe it when you see it. For there is a relationship between two people today and tomorrow they are enemies, they are inseperable today and tomorrow you can’t get them in the same room together. They are "destined to be together" today and tomorrow one of them is bleeding from a broken heart when the other has found someone else to love.

Sure it’s your life and no one should dictate what you do with your body and your life, it’s your business. Be wise is all I say. One of you will remember these words I have said with regret and wonder one day. I’d hate it if that person was you. Do not gamble your future, dreams, hopes and career prospects so easily. There is just so much more you can do with your life, so much you can see and be if you just wait. Even you, men.

It is my duty to tell you these things and I will do it with pride and  over and over again:” God will judge the adulterer and the sexually immoral. Each should have sexual relations with his or her own husband or wife. Respect the marriage bed and keep it holy. Fear God and resist evil, resist the Devil and he will flee from you. After all what will it benefit a man to have all the pleasure, sexual or not, but in the end loose his soul? Do not think you are too weak to resist a man or your sexual urges. Ask Him who is able to give you all things for purity and righteousness and he will give you these things, pouring out control and restraint into the spirit that lives within you. One life y’all, live it right.

                                                                      Hebrews 13:4