When Women Marry

20% of women get married because of circumstance.30% of them will marry because they want to. The remaining 50% however get married in-order to escape some difficult emotional, psychological or financial situation that they are in.

The 20% that marry because of circumstance are those women who find themselves in marriage because of pregnancy or some such happenstance. For these there isn’t much to do but to make their situation the best it can be. It just happened after all, there is nothing else that can be done to reverse it without creating even more damage to their lives. Some live out their marriages happily and some don’t, it’s just the way it is and its best to accept it.

The 30% that marry because they want to have much more choice in the matter as to who and when they will marry. These are the type of women who know that they should not only get married because their bodies are telling them to but because their minds are ready to as well. They will wait till they have reached a maturity of the mind, the emotions and the body. For these marriage is a much more happier affair than those we have talked about before and the ones we are about to turn to next.

Of the 50% of women who marry to get out of a bad emotional, psychological or financial situation only about half will be lucky to find themselves in a fulfilling marriage. I have known and have come across women who just want to get married so that something in their lives can “just be over”.

The problem with that kind of thinking is that the woman is looking at the man as a solution to her problems rather than a person. She will do all sorts of things to hold on to that single answer to all her problems. She will climb high and dance all sorts of ways for it to not disappear. But what she doesn’t realise is that as she is doing all these she is not looking at the man who she will live the rest of her life with, she is not paying attention to his character, lifestyle and habits.

Have you ever wondered why people always say think carefully before you get married? They say look closely at the person you intend to marry. Do you suppose they do that just so you can determine how suitable the two of you are for each other at the time only?

Thing is they do so because they know marriage is a revelatory process that reveals all sorts of things about the person you are married to that you did not know. They say so because they know marriage changes people, it is in the nature of marriage to make people angry, depressed and irritable every once in a while. So they desire that you know how the people you are marrying will be in such situations when faced with bitter pain, disappointment or frustration and anger. The sooner you know the better, for you will then know how to react when it happens or whether you will cope with your partner in such situations.

Those who get married as a solution to their problems however do not get to see all these things. They are shocked later in the marriage when they realise that the problems they had at first are gone but they have no peace as they either married a monster or someone who doesn’t care a twit about them. If at all you marry then marry for love. For it is much more easier to accept harsh words and treatment from a person whom you love than one whom you do not care for.

Love will keep you strong even when you do not feel strong. It will keep you going and will make marriage much more easier to adapt to. Without love however no one cares much about the other and as a consequence neither care about the marriage or its survival and in this case what then will you have achieved? No matter how much money the person showers you with and makes all your problems go away all the time, at some point you will wish the person you are living with cared about you or showed love for you. It’s human nature that we all want that every once in a while, month after month.

The word of God tells us to think carefully before we commit ourselves to a course of action. “The naive believes everything, But the sensible man considers his steps” (Proverbs 14:15). Do not rush to get married and curse yourself with trouble for the rest of your life, after all marriage is a lifelong commitment isn’t it? Why should you curse God and lament the burdens he has placed in your life when in true fact it is you who has allowed yourself to get into such a mess. Let Jehovah be, he is righteous, his ways are perfect. Do not blame him for your mistakes it’s just simply childish.