Affairs of the Heart

It was just a chat. She was a married woman, an old friend. Surely no harm could come out of a few conversations. If  we kept the conversation respectful and I respected her as a married person it would be okay. Or so I thought.

Things changed the time we had this one heart to heart conversation. It was an intimate and sincere conversation at the end of which we both found out we had had a crush on each other back in secondary school even though none of us had done anything about it back then. Knowing someone felt or feels that way about you moves you in some way from one place to another.

From this conversation things got more intimate. Our conversations got more loose and we poured our hearts out. It soon became apparent to me that even though she was married she was in a marriage that left her unloved and needing some affection. I being a guy who hates to see anyone suffer thought well let me just stick around and keep her company and give her that affection she is missing.

Being a single guy with no obligations to anyone I was free as a bird. And so it got a bit more complex with each more Facebook message. We talked when her husband was not at home and when her husband’s relatives were nowhere in sight. I didn’t call, didn’t SMS, we only talked via Facebook when she could and when her husband showed up she disappeared from the conversation.

At one point she said to me, “I have everything I need, you tell me what you want and I will be there for you and will make sure to satisfy”. In other words she  didn’t want me to marry her, didn’t want me to pay her bills, she just wanted to be at my disposal to use as I see fit. You might say to me, you are a single guy and she was definitely in need of some loving whats the problem with that. What an opportunity, a girl you can use as much as you like, anyhow you like, without having to marry or do anything for. Wait for it.

Having been celibate for over a year and single for as long she appeared like an angel in the night. She was pretty so definitely I wanted a taste. Plus she had a whole lot of love to give I could see myself having fun with her. So we had our sexting and love talks and only fell short of agreeing the when and where. In my heart I had already committed adultery with her.

But it remains the same and will never change. As it was written and so it is now: “Let there be no adulterer or sexually immoral among you. For God will judge the adulterer and the sexually immoral.” “Can a man walk on hot coals without his feet being scorched? So is he who sleeps with another man's wife; no one who touches her will go unpunished” (Proverbs 6:29). “But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart “(Matthew 5:28).

Men do not despise a thief if he steals to satisfy his hunger when he is starving. Yet if he is caught, he must pay sevenfold, though it costs him all the wealth of his house. But a man who commits adultery lacks judgment; whoever does so destroys himself. Blows and disgrace are his lot, and his shame will never be wiped away; for jealousy arouses a husband’s fury, and he will show no mercy when he takes revenge. He will not accept any compensation; he will refuse the bribe, however great it is (Proverbs 6:30).

How then could I knowing all these things freely give in to sleeping with  her? Plus how can I being a servant of God come here and tell you to not commit adultery while I freely partake of it myself? So I have resolved to keep away from any intimate communication with any married person lest they drag me into sin. It starts so innocent but always ends in sin either in the heart or the physical body. If we talk at all I will keep it formal and short, there will be no more heart to heart conversations if she is married.

Married women usually are lacking some love or are frustrated enough that they are looking for an escape. They know how to love you and quickly draw you in and entangle you into their web so easily. They have so much love to give and do not demand a lot, they already have all they need at home. They know how to satisfy.

But it is written: ‘Drink water from your own cup, running water from your own well ‘(Proverbs 5:15). Do not lust in your heart after her beauty or let her captivate you with her eyes, for the prostitute reduces you to a loaf of bread, and the adulteress preys upon your very life (Proverbs 6:25).

I take no pleasure in airing out my dirty laundry in public like this. But I have been called by Jehovah himself to show you right from wrong so that in doing right you may fear the Lord and save your souls. Far be it from me to deny to speak when my God prompts me with a message for his people. I have repented of my sins, I have asked for forgiveness and strength for my flesh is weak. I make no promise about tomorrow but I know Gods law and I will follow it to the best of my ability and if I don’t it will condemn me. May God grant you strength to withstand the temptation to fall into adultery.

Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral (Hebrews 13:4)